Estonia - End

Just 21 years ago, Estonia won its independence. A small country that has a long history of being occupied by other nations, it finally was it's own free nation. Just 21 years ago, it was illegal to be a Christian and be open about it here. It was illegal to gather together to worship. It was illegal to gather together to pray. During the Soviet era there was a pastor who dreamed that one day, all believers in the country could publicly gather and worship together. Most believed it was a pipe dream that would never happen.

That dream happened in Estonia today. Today was Kristuspaeval 2012 (Christ Day 2012) in Estonia. As a conference we all gathered in a soccer stadium and joined Estonian nationals from every region of Estonia to gather together to worship and pray for this small country. Organized by CRU staff in Estonia and others, pastors from all denominations and churches from all over the country gathered together to beseech the Lord to bring revival to Estonia and that it would spread to all the world. It was an incredible day and so fun to be a part of.

Here is a picture from the day.

This evening, for my last time few hours in Tallinn, I decided to walk through Old Town one last time. I bought a couple of last minute souvenirs and then decided to hit the square one last time. I'm so glad I did. In the square were some of the youth from our conference who are participating in the arts track, singing songs and sharing testimonies. These particular youth were a band from Germany, so they were actually pretty good. I laughed as I listened to acoustic songs by Katy Perry and others. But as I sat there and listened, I almost broke down in tears. Yes, I'm exhausted. Yes, it's been a full week here in Tallinn and my heart is full. But as I listened to them sing and share testimonies to a crowd of Estonians that had gathered around, I just kept thinking about how far things in Estonia had come. And how great our God is.

Just over 20 years ago, this was illegal. 15 years ago, this was just unlikely. When I lived here then, stuff like this just didn't happen. I doubt then that anyone would have stopped and listened. But somehow, today, Estonians are different. They stopped. They engaged. They watched. They listened. They clapped. They let their children dance right by the performers. They were happy.

Yes, Estonia is one of the least churched nations in Europe. Yes, less than 1% claim to follow Jesus. And yet tonight I saw hope. And hope not just for Estonia, but for all of Western Europe. This week has showed me that God is up to something in Europe and people are coming to know Him, sometimes miraculously so. He has not turned His back on this land.

I had a drink tonight with an American/Canadian family that has lived here for 17 years and was around when I lived in Tartu, Linden and Janice Viinalass. They are an incredible couple who moved here with their 5 kids to be salt and light to Linden's Estonian relatives. Tonight Linden encouraged me with these words. "Go with our Great God." Go with our Great God. Hmmm. As I move forward in my life, I want to go with, not just God, but remembering that He is indeed great. I want to go with my Great God. And now, as I leave Estonia, I pray that our Great God will move in this nation and across all of Western Europe. He is able to do exceedingly, abundantly beyond all we ask and imagine.

And so my time in Estonia comes to an end. But what a day! Christ Day in the soccer stadium, the Viinalass', and truth being declared to an interested audience in the square! Again, what a day. No doubt I will continue processing all that has transpired this week. I hope this week stays with me. I hope I continue going with our Great God.

Next stop - London. Go Team USA!

Estonia Part 3

So part of my coming back to Tallinn was not just to see old friends, but to participate in "Heartbeat Tallinn," a conference for all of Western European Campus Crusade for Christ staff and students. It's really been a unique and special time and really good for my heart. So good, I'm actually having a hard time putting words to it. But I will try to capture a bit of what I've experienced.

First, it's been great to see that there are people in Western Europe who passionately love Jesus and long to see their countries reached with the Gospel and they are trusting Jesus with really big things. We have heard testimonies from all over of people coming to know the Lord. Some of the most encouraging stories for me have been ones that talk about Muslims from Iran coming to know Jesus in Great Britain. And then the stories of Albania, where only 20 years ago there were MAYBE 1000 believers to now having 110 CRU staff members and sending out others to reach neighboring Muslim countries. It is encouraging to see what God is doing around the world.

It is also challenging. When I was on staff with CRU I took being a part of large movements like this for granted. The large vision we had was just part of the job. I'm realizing I've really missed being a part of a large movement/vision. This week has been a really good reminder that it's really not about me. Of course I know that, but I'm very quick to forget. And back in Texas I get so caught up just in the crap of life (debt, bills, entertainment, job, career, etc) that I forgot about mission. Life can easily drown out mission and I have allowed it to do so. There is something here that I miss. I don't think this means I'm going to re-join staff with CRU or anything. But this should mean something. We'll have to wait and see.

I've also been hit with this phrase that one of the speakers, a staff guy from Switzerland, said yesterday. He asked, "have you lowered your faith, to match your experience?" That has stuck with me. I was immediately struck with how that is true in my life. My experience has been king lately, dictating how I feel and sometimes what I do. I've allowed my faith to grow small. I've let circumstances dictate my faith instead of choosing faith to overcome the circumstances. I'm tired of having small faith. Again, not sure what will come of this. But something should.

And it has been so sweet to see old friends who were involved in the ministry some as far back as 18 years ago. Thursday night we celebrated the 25th anniversary of CRU in Estonia. It was a special event attended by Steve Douglas, Vonette Bright, and other CRU big wigs were in the house too (Steve Sellers and even Paul Eshelman). But the best part for me was reconnecting with old familiar faces. Here is Meelika. I met her on summer project in 1994. She wasn't a believer when we met, but became one with the CRU team that followed the summer project. I came back a year later and took up discipling her. I remember tackling the book of Hebrews with her, which was quite an undertaking. She is now married, with 2 kids and is a practicing doctor in her town. She continues to walk with Jesus and is doing well.

And then there is Dima. I love this kid (who is not really a kid anymore!). Dima was involved in our ministry for several years (6-7 years). He was in high school when I first met him. He is a VIP in the Estonia Ministry of Finance now and is working on his PhD in Norway (something about using marketing to make people feel better about paying their taxes!). But more than that, he holds a special place in my heart and always will. I surprised myself by getting teary when I saw him and am even a little teary now as I type this thinking about him. Honestly, I'm not sure about his walk with the Lord. There are things in his life that I think could hinder it, but we didn't really get a chance to talk about it. But we are committed to staying in touch via facebook. Please pray for him.

And finally, Katri. Katri was also involved in CRU for several years and I had the privilege of visiting a hospital during an outreach with Katri on Wednesday. It was so fun to connect with her and do ministry together again. She is doing well and involved in her local church.

In many ways, my heart is full. And yet there is one more, very exciting day left here in Estonia. Tomorrow is a special day. But I'll save that for tomorrow's post.

Of course, another effect of being here is that I'm really missing living in Europe. But that's all I'll say about that otherwise my family may revolt against me. Don't worry parents, I have no plans currently. ;-)

Estonia Day 2

This is the view from my hotel room. Nothing special here. The only thing of note is that it's 10:15 PM. Hello white nights.

Also here are some more views of Old Town. Since I was last here, they have renovated and opened the tower of town hall so that now you can climb to the top and take pictures. The staircase was steep and narrow but we made it. And as we discovered, the bell does still ring on the hour. Thankfully it was only 4 pm when we were there. Anyway, some of the pictures are from the top of the tower.

My next post, maybe even later today, I'll write more about the conference and what has been so special about being here. Stay tuned.

Estonia - Day 1

So amazing to be back in Estonia. I think it's been 10+ years since my last visit. A lot has changed. When I first came here back in 1994, it was still very obvious that this place had once been under Soviet rule. That is no longer true. At least in the modern city center. I once remember saying that visiting Helsinki, Finland or Stockholm, Sweden were glimpes of what Estonia would have been without the Soviet occupation. Well, I was right. In the 20+ years of being independent, the Estonians have all but erased the evidence of occupation. There are modern and western shopping malls and movie theaters and I haven't seen one Lada (which was a ridiculous Russian vehicle with a motor about as powerful as the one that powers your Dad's riding lawn mower). Estonia has joined the West. Western Europe to be exact. Which of course could be a mixed blessing. My cab driver from the airport spent time telling me about Estonia's economic difficulty. Small potatoes when compared to Greece, but still hard for those who call this place home.

Old Town Tallinn is still one of my favorite places on earth. Old cobblestone streets, sidewalk cafe's everywhere, quaint buildings, beautiful flowers, etc. If you try you can almost picture the peasants selling their wares with the princes and knights riding through on their horses. It's sometimes magical to be in a place 1000 years old. Today the food in those cafes is a bit more expensive and there are WAY more tourists than I ever remember, but the place is still charming. And while there IS a McDonalds in Old Town, there is no Starbucks anywhere. Some may think that sad, but I'm pleased that Old Town has mostly maintained the "old." Of course, a Starbucks in one of those malls that is pretty close would be just fine. I guess while many toursists have discovered this little, great place, Starbucks and other western commerical endeavors have not. Something tells me it's just a matter of time. And more than likely I would just learn how to say, "grande vanilla latte" in Estonian.

My first full day has been fun. I connected with some old friends who live in Spain but are here for the same reason as I and I had plenty of time to explore some things on my own. I'm calling it the calm before the storm. The conference starts in a couple of hours. Giddy up.