Recently we participated in our company’s worldwide day of prayer. It was a corporate mandate that we take a day in our busy schedule, stop, come before the Lord, and pray. It was time to beseech our sovereign Lord to glorify Himself in our ministry, to show up, to bless, to change lives, etc. So we gathered on the designated Tuesday morning, hovered around the snacks (so much for fasting) and waited with dread for the day to begin. It seemed that no one, including myself, wanted to be there. And since we were all so busy with important events coming up, we decided to only pray for half a day and call it quits at lunchtime.
Was it Hudson Taylor who said something like, “I have a lot to do today so I should pray twice as much.” Well, if it wasn’t him, it was some cool spiritual giant that has gone before us. My point is this, what has happened in our spiritual lives that we so quickly sacrifice prayer? Are our tasks really that important or could it be that praying more is the very task we should be doing? When presented with the opportunity to participate in something that has spiritual depth, why do we balk?
I’ve been wrestling with this question lately. I’m involved in the singles ministry at my church. And whether in my community group or in our evening worship service, whenever we do anything that is participatory and has spiritual depth to it, well… very few participate, including myself.
Are we afraid of intimacy with Jesus? I’m not sure I can answer that. I’m not sure I really know what intimacy with Jesus looks like (or intimacy with anyone for that matter). But to be honest, I’m not sure that question is even on the radar. Whether I’m afraid of intimacy with Him or not (after all, He knows me and all the things about me I’m ashamed of) I think it’s more that I am content in the shallow relationship I have with Him. Or I just don’t know any different.
To me, if I can make a sweeping, unfair statement, this defines a majority of the singles at my church (again, including myself). And here is what I think is missing. The Gospel.
No wonder my relationship with Him is shallow. It is so easy to go through our days and not experience the Gospel in our lives. We've made a habit of treating the Gospel like fire insurance, our ticket to heaven as the sayings go. We buy it and never think about it again, or if we do, it's on our deathbed. And why not, daily experiencing the Gospel is hard. After all, experiencing the Gospel involves dealing with sin in our own lives and perhaps confronting it in others. That is never fun. At church in my community group I sense a general reluctance to really deal with sin. And in my own life I’ve grown adept at glossing over it and rationalizing it. Therefore repentance and forgiveness and healing and growth… etc. are missing and thus, the Gospel is absent too.
The Gospel or the lack thereof affects everything we do. If I’m not experiencing the Gospel, I’m not experiencing true, Biblical community. If I’m not experiencing the Gospel, then I’m forgetting my true identity as a believer. If I’m not experiencing the Gospel, then I’m running in shame from my Lord, instead of boldly approaching His throne to find grace and mercy in my time of need. And if I’m not experiencing the Gospel then yes, I probably am afraid of intimacy with Jesus. And finally, if I’m not experiencing the Gospel, then my motivation to pray is limited. Without the Gospel, prayer is sort of pointless, tasks become the focus, and we stop seeking His glory. It becomes all about us and what we do, whether we realize it or not.
Oh to experience the Gospel (and thus intimacy with Jesus) in such a way that I can honestly say, in community, “we have a lot to do, let’s pray all day.” Not because we should, but because we long too. Because we can’t wait to spend a day with the lover of our soul. Because we know who He is and thus, who we are with all of our sin, and our desperate need for Him. Because we know we are loved. Because we know we need the Gospel.
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